This story originally appeared in our Queer Issue on June 4, 2025.

Y’all, money is scary. Given the state of the world, I find myself oscillating between caring about financial stability as a potential way to feel safe, and pondering if the US will continue to exist long enough for the dollar to be of little more use than wallpaper.

Even though this is a super weird time to think about your wallet, if you happen to be on the side of stability craving vs country escape plans, I’d love to share some clear, shame-free, and actionable financial basics. 

You’re not the only one who doesn’t understand money stuff. I sure as hell didn’t, and most don’t. That’s why we have crypto bros buying NFTs, grandparents mailing checks to TV salesmen, and high-powered financiers robbing us all. However, the more stability you build, the more power you’ll have to support your community and stand up for what matters.

Disclaimer: Everything here is purely informational. Please do your own digging before making big decisions, and don’t come for me. I’m just some person who did a bunch of research and wanted to share what I learned for free so that folks don’t get p0wned by corporations. 

There’s also the sad fact that some people are just screwed by the system. I hope this advice helps, but none of it would be necessary if the government had woven social safety nets instead of an anti-social death pit. 

What Makes You Happy?

You have to work to make money. But when it’s in your pocket, its sole purpose should be to make you happy and align with your values. If it’s not doing that, some corporate scumbag has tricked you into running the rat race. Ask yourself two questions.

What are 3 to 5 things that bring you joy on a regular basis? Doing the  crossword with your partner? Giving belly rubs to the kitty-cat? Toasting your buns at Denny Blaine?

What are 3 to 5 values, causes, or commitments that matter to you? Immigrant rights? Environmental justice? Personal freedom? Shoo-ing Stuart Sloan away from Denny Blaine?

Seriously, make a list. Think of it as your compass. Each financial decision should point directly back to these. 

Now for the Plan

First, figure out how much you make and how much you spend. If you don’t know, you’re not alone, but the first step of financial planning is getting those numbers down. For income, gather your pay stubs and bank statements. For expenses, card users can utilize aggregators like Yodlee. Cash people, commit to manually tracking your receipts. Either way, you’ll want at least three months of data to review.

Once you’ve crunched those numbers, ask yourself a deeper question: Does my spending align with my values?

Compare your values with each one of last month’s expenses. Then do it again. Look for patterns.

Springing for a newspaper subscription is a good choice if your daily joy is the crossword. If the perfect morning starts with black coffee, and supporting immigrant rights is a core value, going to the Vietnamese-owned café down the block is money well spent. But if you’re dropping $300 a month on Uber rides while “environmental justice” is literally on your values list … reconsider. (Also: Buses exist. They vibrate. It’s kinda like a massage.)

Reflecting isn’t about guilt. It’s about alignment. Don’t punish yourself for past decisions. Evaluate with open eyes and move forward. 

Compound Interest: It’s Boring Until It Works

Compound interest is the single most important concept in personal finance. For real, don’t glaze over this section because it has numbers. Everything clicks into place once you get it. But beware: It can be your friend or a bitter foe.

When compound interest plays nice, your money earns money—and then that money earns more money. Pretty cool. Imagine you have $1000. If you invest that and it returns 10% per year, you’ll have $1,100 after a year. But next year, you don’t just earn another $100—you earn $110, because now you’re earning interest on the accumulated $1,100. After year 2, you’ve made $1,210.

Now for the magic: Wait 10 years and the original $1000 has compounded to $2,593.74. You’ve done nothing but played the same game the 1% has played for generations. Time and percentages are the secret ingredients. The sooner you start, the more powerful it becomes.

Now for a walk on the evil side. Free money. That was exciting. But let’s say you have $5,000 in credit card debt at 24% APR (which is extremely typical). Let’s not pay any of it for ten years. Holy shit. We’ve accumulated over $50k in interest—on top of the original $5,000. Y’all, that’s literally insane! Big financial institutions are crushing ordinary people with interest. How steeply debt climbs is directly associated with the “APR” that credit cards hide by offering the first year at 0%.

Every month you carry a balance, the debt compounds. It’s like an investment … but into a financial pit. Personal rant: 24% interest rates should literally be illegal. Someone please work on that.

Debt: When You Actually Should Budget

By now, you may be panic-reflecting on your situation. Breathe. If you have high-interest debts like credit card balances, it’s budget time. 

Take your fixed expenses (food, rent, utilities, transit) and evaluate where you can trim costs (can we sell the car and bike instead?). After you’ve done your best, consider what else can be cut. Can you sub things for low-cost or free alternatives that still support your values and happiness? Try swapping expensive habits for low-budget or free alternatives. Buy more books than you have time to read? Snag a library card. Do this enough and you’ll save without feeling like you’re missing out. Budgeting isn’t about suffering. It’s about prioritizing what matters. We’re aiming for a sustainable, steady path toward debt elimination that preserves your dignity and happiness. Go too hard and you’ll end up in an unstable self-denial/indulgence cycle.

Emergency Fund = Your Personal Insurance Policy Against Debt

It’s a simple formula: Emergency Fund Amount = 3–6 x Monthly Expenses. If you spend $2K a month, aim to save $6K–$12K, after you’ve taken care of your debt.

This is not your vacation fund. It’s your “sleep good” starter pack for job loss, unexpected bills, and life’s “holy shit” moments. It is also a “fuck you fund” if your job conflicts with your values. Put it in a boring, easily accessible savings account. 

Investing: Why’d You Have To Make Things So Complicated?

If you want to beat inflation—invest. But only if you have sent any high-interest debts back to hell and have money you won’t need for five to 10 years.

I recommend low-cost index funds like VTSAX, or other similar ones. An index fund is a simple way to invest in the entire market—your money gets split across tons of companies, based on their value, like a big capitalist smoothie. So instead of buying a single Tesla stock and praying Elon doesn’t tweet something unhinged at 3 am, you’re investing in all the companies and hoping if one company falls, the rest will balance it out. The “expense ratios” on these should be well below 0.2%. If not, run!

If you want to keep your money out of evildoers like BP, look into “ESG”s, which are managed funds that attempt to weed out companies that go against certain core principles. You’re not trying to beat the market like your crypto-crazed Uncle Geoff. You’re trying to get in on its long-term growth. Big disclaimer: The market swings wildly, but has historically gone up given enough time. Just leave your investments alone!

Retirement Accounts: It’s Just Investing With Extra Steps

They’re like government-labeled, tax-advantaged jars for your investments. Each one has different rules. Your employer might offer a matched 401(k). Freelancers can consider IRAs (not that IRA, unless…). You can open one of these on your own and even roll over 401(k) funds from old jobs, but regardless, remember to have them all invested in low-cost index funds! 

Giving Back: Build It In

Finances can feel a bit like Monopoly. But it ain’t. So please remember to give back. Pick a percentage of your yearly income (even 1% is a start) and, if you can, give consistently. Support causes, people, movements, mutual aid. You don’t have to be rich to give.